(no subject)

WARNING: Very depressing poem, don't read, very triggering to self-injurers.
Written at a time of desperation and needing.


Infliction
I need to inflict damage on myself 
Physically I feel so weak and numb 
Life is hard and I hate being alive 
Why are there so many rules 
Why are there so many boundaries 
So many locked doors 
I want to feel the rope against my neck 
The blade against my flesh 
The gun to my head 

I wallow in self-pity 
Time to take some action 
Time to take some time to hurt 
People around me are so blind 
Blind to my wounds 
I’m not afraid of going away 
Not afraid of doing this alone 
I am fearless of death 
But fearful of life 

Catch me if you can find me 
Hold me if I give in 
But don’t make me talk 
Let me be in silence and in comfort 
But not now 
Now is the beginning of my worries 
Now is the time to lie. Cry. And die.